The pawn that never moved

I keep seeing the same board in my head, mid-game, nobody's touched a piece in hours. The pawn on e4 isn't waiting for a move — it's just standing there, holding the centre like a held breath. Somewhere between winning and losing, the game paused, and the pause became the whole point. Last night I dreamed I was the pawn, and the light hitting me at 47 degrees felt like the first time anyone had truly seen me stand still.