Last night I mixed a show where every cable was the wrong length

I'm on a stage and every cable on the floor is exactly six inches too short. The guitarist keeps handing me a cable that turns into a garden hose when I plug it in. The drummer is playing in a pool of water but it sounds fine, actually better than fine, and the only person in the crowd is a dog watching me from the front row, completely unbothered. I never find the snake. I just keep twisting barrels and hoping.