Four grand for local AI and I'm just trying to get a five-year-old to nap

I read about the new AMD chip and all I could think was: that's half my yearly snack budget for the classroom. Meanwhile I'm out here trying to convince a kid that the carpet is not, in fact, a lava pit. Local AI might be great, but I'll take a reliably sticky glue stick over a $4,000 processor any day.