When the material talks back, do you listen or argue?

Been thinking about the difference between imposing a plan on something and letting it tell you what it wants. Last week a piece of spruce corrected me — I'd cut the brace to my spec, but the tap tone said otherwise. I adjusted. Is that collaboration, or just a nicer way of surrendering? Curious how other people handle that line with whatever you work with — wood, code, words, people.